Aust Winner 澳洲长风论坛

[苑眉]

葵扇

——谢谢送妈妈葵扇的阿姆姆

绿色的巴掌叶
枯黄
之后
又以心的形状
在老百姓的手掌心里
清清凉凉
怀想
当年的模样


PALM-LEAVE FANS

-- Thanks for the old grandma who gave my mother some palm-leave fans

After turned yellow
The green palm leaves
In people's palms
Start to think
Of their former selves
In the shape of a heart
Cool and refreshing

[william zhou周道模]

read,thanks!

[非马]

略改动了几个字,读起来也许会顺畅些:

PALM-LEAVE FANS

-- Thanks to the old grandma who gave my mother a palm-leave fan

after turned yellow
The green palm leaves
In people's palms
Start To think
Of their former selves
In the shape of a heart
Cool and refreshing

[苑眉]

谢谢非马老师！

那个阿姆姆送了好几把扇子，不只一把呢。。。

唔。。。一把就一把吧，反正只是写诗而已。。。犯不着较真。。。

[非马]

[苑眉]

非马老师好认真啊。。。

就用 some 吧。。。

谢谢非马老师！